I have a 13 year curse.

[Great White Drake]

Like clockwork, every 13 years I shit my pants.

Obviously as a baby and that’s ok, it’s normal. What isn’t normal is shopping with your mom at target at 13 years old and having a fear of public bathrooms at the time. I propped myself up against a clothes rack, crossed my feet and squoze my butt cheeks as hard as I could but it stubbornly came out like a spaghetti play-doh.

26. I’m at work. Get in the truck and as soon as I sit down I grow 4”.

I’m 39 this year. I’ve been waiting. I’m 3 months away from 40 and was getting cocky, scoffing at the thought of this curse being real but then this morning happened. I had a horrific smelling fart before I left for work but dismissed it. Literally and figuratively….. I threw caution at the wind. After dismissing this warning shot I get in my car and start my drive to work. 20 mins later my body decides I need to shit. And immediately. I raise up off the seat, I fought the good fight but eventually gave in….

I’m not looking forward to 52.

Click to read more...

 

[Jimy Bilmo]

 

[Gav'sPurpleZ]

 

[Lord Tin Foilhat]

Dash cam caught the facial reaction....

 

[blue-sun]

 

[Shawn1112]

WTF lmmfao

 

[Great White Drake]

The ride home was no fun. Window down just to get fresh air as I’m gagging.

 

[Shawn1112]

The ride home was no fun. Window down just to get fresh air as I’m gagging.

What did you tell your boss? I just shit my pants, I'm going home?

 

[Jimy Bilmo]

The fact this is a thread............................................

 

[Great White Drake]

What did you tell your boss? I just shit my pants, I'm going home?

Yea. I’m not chancing it.

 

[Great White Drake]

The fact this is a thread............................................

Everyone’s done it. Tell us your story mr. Jim. Owning it is very therapeutic. This is a judgement free zone.

 

[Jimy Bilmo]

Everyone’s done it. Tell us your story mr. Jim. Owning it is very therapeutic. This is a judgement free zone.

Outside of a baby, I have successfully made it, to this point in my life, without shitting myself - and I fart A LOT

 

[Great White Drake]

Outside of a baby, I have successfully made it, to this point in my life, without shitting myself - and I fart A LOT

A unicorn. Congrats on your success but some of us are slobs.

 

[Jimy Bilmo]

Live look at Great White Drake

 

[FirstWorldProblems]

Dude I've legit only heard of an adult shitting his pants once in my life lol, guy that lived a few houses down that was always drunk got out of his work truck with a giant shitstain on his pants.

This is hilarious

 

[SpeedSpeak2me]

Seems fitting for the topic

 

[boostedguy05]

 

[Great White Drake]

It’s much more anti climactic. The whole shituation beats you to submission.

 

[DEEZUZ]

Thought this happened to you 6ish years ago too

 

[DEEZUZ]

But I have a shit memory

 

[Great White Drake]

Thought this happened to you 6ish years ago too

Not that I can remember. Maybe a small shart?

 

[Great White Drake]

Dude I've legit only heard of an adult shitting his pants once in my life lol, guy that lived a few houses down that was always drunk got out of his work truck with a giant shitstain on his pants.

This is hilarious

Interesting. A lot of my friends have had this happen. I think it’s a truck driver thing.

 

[b00sted]

I shit my pants when I was 10ish on the way home from michigan. We ate lunch at an apple orchard just before leaving and I drank like 3-4 glasses of fresh cider - which was apparently a mistake. Then we hit gridlock traffic somewhere in Indiana and the rest was history. My dad made me sit on a plastic Jewel bag the rest of the way home.

 

[Jimy Bilmo]

I shit my pants when I was 10ish on the way home from michigan. We ate lunch at an apple orchard just before leaving and I drank like 3-4 glasses of fresh cider - which was apparently a mistake. Then we hit gridlock traffic somewhere in Indiana and the rest was history. My dad made me sit on a plastic Jewel bag the rest of the way home.

Did you tell him you had to shit? I’ve gone full Indian and shit on the side of the road before. NFG.

 

[Turbocharged400sbc]

Do you fecal these things accurately in your advanced years?