Fun with car brand names

wtw5974

What in the Hell?
Mar 2, 2004
942
0
Enjoy :biggthump

ACURA
Always Catching Up, Rarely Ahead
A Car Usually Rarely Appreciates

AUDI
Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented
Always Upside-down, Double Interest
Another Understated Dealer Incentive

BMW

Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Beautiful Models Wanted
Bavarian Manure Wagon
Biggest Metal Waste
Big Money Works
Bought My Wife
Brutal Money Waster
Break My Window
Bring More Women
Bring More Wrenches
Bavarian Money Waster
Bring My Wad!
Blew My Wad!
Big Money Wasted
Bring Money Where?
Buy More Women

BUICK

Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CADILLAC

Company Always Denies Its Lawful Liability After Collisions

CAMARO

Cash Always Miniscule After Retail Overpricing

CHEVROLET

Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Cheap Heap Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time


CHEVY
Can Hear Every Valve, Rod, or Lifter Every Time
Can't Have Everything Vern, YaknowwhatImean?
Cheapest Heap Ever Visualized Yet


CHRYSLER
Everyone knows who Lee Iacocca is right? His name IACOCCA stands for:
I Am Chairman Of Chrysler Corporation America
Company Has Recommended You Start Learning Engine Repair Company Has Rid Your Savings Legally: Electronic Robbery
Chrysler Has Raped Your Sanity Loser - Expect Repercussions
PT Loser (for PT Cruiser name)
PT Boozer

DODGE
Darn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Design Of Diabolical German Engineer
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Damned Old Dudes Going Everywhere
Damn Overhauls Do Get Expensive
Dear Old Dad's Garbage Engine
Don't Our Dealers Gouge Everyone

Dodge Neon: Need Engine Overhauled Now

FERRARI
Ferociously Elegant Racer Ravages All Roads Intuitively

FIAT
Found In A Trashcan
Futile Italian Attempt at Transportation
Failure In Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix it again, Tony!
Fix It Another Time





GEO

Get Everything Overpriced
Got Everything Overhauled



GM

General Maintenance
Genital Motors
Give More
GiMme
Getting Malignant
Got Me
Grab Me





GMC

God's Mechanical Curse
Garage Man's Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?
Greatest Mistake Created
Great Mountain of Crap
Greasy Messy Contraption
Gay Man's Chevy
Gimme My Checkbook!
Get More Cash!

HONDA

Had One, Never Did Again
Horribly Overpriced, Needing Dad's Assistance
Hang On, Not Done Accelerating
Honest, Officer, Nobody Drank Anything
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else
Honda Options: No Deal Available!
Hold On, No Dealer Add-ons!
Honda Options Never Deal Affordably
Hang On, No Dealer Acquisistions!

HUMMER

Hope U Made Me Extra Reliable

HYUNDAI
Here's Y U Never Drive An Import
Hope You Understand: Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive
Hardly Your Understanding New Dealer Allowance Incentive
Hold Your Usual Nitpicks, Designs Are Improved
Hang Your UNDerwear Anywhere Inside
Hope You Understand, No Deals Available Inside

Jeep
Just Empty Every Pocket
Just Expect Every Problem
Just Eats Every Penny
Junk Everyone Eventually Piles
Just Expect Extra Payments

Jaguar
Just A Guess U Are Rich

Kia
Keep It Away!
Kick It's Ass
Korean Imitation Accord
Korea's Imported Accident
Killer's Imported Asset
Kiss It Away
Killed In Action
Keep Inside Asia
Korea Invades America
Killer Implosion Awaits

LAMBORGHINI
Loser Always Maintains Big Old Rotten Gunk; Hardly Inflates Nobody's Image

LOTUS
Loads Of Trouble Usually Serious

Maserati
Must Also Suggest Extra Rope And Towing Implements

MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along
Must Always Zoom Down Asphalt
Most Are Zealously Duped Always






MERCEDES
My Expensive Race Car Emits Dense Exhaust Smoke - But Efficiency Near Zero
Most Expensive Road Car Everyone Drives Except Steve
Merger Engaged Reverse Chrysler Entering Decline Evident Soon


MITSUBISHI

Management Incessantly Tolerates Socially Unacceptable Behavior, Ignoring Sexual Harassment Incidents
May Involve Turbos, Suck Unless Boost Is Seriously High Inside
Men In Tight Spots Uttering Bulls__t In Sexual Harassment Investigation

MOPAR
Match Old Parts As Required
My Old Pig Ain't Runnin'
Move Over People Are Racing
Mostly Old Parts And Rust
Motor On Pavement After Race
Moments Of Power Are Rare

NISSAN

Need I Say Something About Nothing
Never In Season Simply A No-show


OLDSMOBILE

Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick`s Irregular Leftover Equipment

PONTIAC

Poor Old Ninny Thinks It's A Cadillac
Piece Of Nasty Tacky Icky Ass Crap
Pretty Overpriced Not That I Am Concerned

PORSCHE
PORSCHE- Plenty Of Receipts. Sorry, Can't Have Everything

SAAB
Some Ass Actually Boughtit!
Styling Absent After Buyout
Backwards >>>> Bad Asses Always Suffocate
Sorry Auto Assembled Backwards
Sad Attempt At Beauty
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown
Sorry Assed American Buyers
Start Adding Additional Brake fluid
Stop Asking About Brakes!
Sorry As A Bum

SALEEN
Some Aristocrats Love Every Expensive Novelty

SATURN
Sorry Assed Transmission Under Repair Now
Some Argue That Ubiquitous Repairs Needed
Send Another Towtruck Ubiquitous Repairs Needed
Same American Trash Under Revised Name

SUBARU
Stupid Urbanites Bumbling Around Rural Areas
SUBARU backwards is: U R A BUS (You are a bus)

TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto
This One You Oughta Tow Away
To Operate Your Own Terrific Automobile
Tolerances Over Yielding, Often Towed Away
Toyota Overcharges You On Their Accessories

VOLVO

Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
Very Overpriced Lame Vehicle Options

VW
Virtually Worthless
Very Wonderful
Very Weird
Very Old Lowered Kinky Sedan With A Great Engine Noise
Volks Who?
 
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