Things you have said while working on a car

[Fish]

I stole the idea from clubgp. Just run with it.

Things I said doing a tune up on the baby mamas car last week. 97 GTP/GTX

"Who the hell put this PCV valve in backwards"

"Fucking #6 plug. This car needs headers"

"Wow that ground wire looks like ass. Ill get it next time"

"Holy shit this filter is filthy" It was dark brown. Still only got it half clean after spraying and rinsing 4 times

"Wow, it starts alot easier with no dirty ass filter"

"8* of knock??!!?!?!?!"

"Wow those LTFTs are out of wack"

"No TB screen?"

"Thats why the car feels like ass" Both motor mount brackets were loose.

"Who the fuck put this car back together?" Miller/BumpinGTP

"Thank god it hit the ground"

"Wow, these plugs were all off gap" Some were .058 and some were .060+

"This car needs the recall done"

Then the obligatory swears.

Some things Ive said while working on my old car:

"GOD DAMN REAR HEADER!! GO IN!!!" Ended up using a hammer and a piece of wood out of desparation and anger.

"I <3 SLPs. They cut my spark plug changes down by at least 10 minutes.

*looks at buddy* "I think I found a piece of wood from the header install inside the rear valve cover." I wish I took a pic. It was at least a 6 inch long, one inch wide piece of wood chilling at the bottom of the head in oil.

"How many CAIs am I going to run?" This was while I was changing to my third one.

"I hate this little EGR tube. Fuck it. Off you go." Removed the entire thing

Thats all I can think of.

Click to read more...

 

[LSx S10]

i usually get pissed pretty easy so most of the time ill spend cursing whoever designed what im working on at the time, generally i do a lot of yelling and hitting things which sometimes gives me something new to fix.

 

[Dasfinc]

Motor swap:

Friend asks "So what are you gonna do with this?" referring to old header
Me - "This" lobs it

*Continues with me pitching things as they are removed from the car*
"Bye Bye engine harness"
"Bye Bye Axles"
"Bye Bye motor mount.... Wait, Shit, I might need that"

"I'm cold, It's dark, and I'm wet, and I just want to hear it fucking run" - *day 2 of engine swap, JUST loosing the last bit of daylight as we were installing the fuel line*

"I don't care what it takes, just get it the fuck off"
*My friend then asks*
"can we go buy a hacksaw then?"
*My response*
"Fuck yea"
:

 

[Euro]

"why the fuck would they put that here!?!?!?"

"mother FUCKER"

"oh you soooooonnnnn of a bitch"

"GM can eat a dick"

"where the fuck did my 11, 13, and 15mm sockets go?"

*tool drops down in between the radiator and front bumper* "FUCK...never seeing that tool again.." (gp guys know that one)


There's more, I can't remember them.....a lot of expletives though.

 

[Mook]

please dont squeeze that coolant hose again

shortly followed by "you fucking cocks"

 

[Dasfinc]

I do have another, kinda long though:

*I was talking to a friend of mine about design flaws with the SHO motor in the taurus platform, it went something like this:*

"Its funny, I seriously think that when the Japanese designed this motor, and heard it was for the taurus, they delibritly moved things around to make them as hard as possible to work on... For example, why the fuck does it take 3 hours to change the spark plugs, I'm sure some little fucker was at his desk designing this thing going 'hahahaha, Fucking americans, have fun changing the sparkplugs!' Then there is the placement of the rear Oxygen sensor, I'm sure again, some little fucker was at his desk going 'hahaha, Fucking americans, try to fit your fat arms in THIS gap, hahahaha' "

 

[Angus]

"how the hell did they fit this in here??"

"this is really plastic?"

"I need duct tape and zip ties"

And the most popular one:

"DC can eat a dick!"

 

[Mook]

why is their a dorrito in the fuse box?

 

[Dasfinc]

why is their a dorrito in the fuse box?

Reminds me of another

"Why are there cheeze-its behind the radio bezel?"

 

[Fish]

"how the hell did they fit this in here??"

"this is really plastic?"

"I need duct tape and zip ties"

And the most popular one:

"DC can eat a dick!"

You should have been like

"Nitrous is flamable?"

"When did Mitsubishi steal my car and give it a gay speed bump like the first and second gen eclipses??"

 

[OffshoreDrilling]

My favorite one liners:

Mother FUCKER
Son of a bitch
God Damnit
What the fuck.

Im usually working on my car alone, and mostly just yelling out of frustration.

 

[Angus]

You should have been like

"Nitrous is flamable?"

"When did Mitsubishi steal my car and give it a gay speed bump like the first and second gen eclipses??"

nitrous isn't flammable....

and it's not that noticeable .......:/

another:

"fuck! broke that, pop's I need your car to go back to the dealership"

 

[Fish]

nitrous isn't flammable....

and it's not that noticeable .......:/

another:

"fuck! broke that, pop's I need your car to go back to the dealership"

Your right. It only makes fire burn faster. I think that has a name....

 

[OffshoreDrilling]

Oxidizer.

 

[Fish]

Oxidizer.

 

[keyonus]

"fuck"

 

[IDAFC21]

heres one i used just yesterday

"where the hells the damn fuse box??"

cuz in the gto, to get to the inside fuse box, you have to rip off the entire kick panel underneath the steering wheel. the manual just says its "on the drivers side underneath the instrument cluster" and provides no pictures or anything.

 

[DanJ]

"*tool drops down in between the radiator and front bumper* "FUCK...never seeing that tool again.." (gp guys know that one)

I got lucky and got my 10mm deep socket back because i heard it fall out and bounce up against the bottom of the car. That area is a black hole though.

 

[Euro]

I got lucky and got my 10mm deep socket back because i heard it fall out and bounce up against the bottom of the car. That area is a black hole though.

Yeah it is. I'm pretty sure I have a 11 or 13mm socket in mine now. I've dropped screwdrivers, socket wrenches, sockets, bolts, nuts...you name it!! lol

 

[SHOmuff]

Hello...parts.

 

[CamaroSS]

usually alot of swearing and it ends with "fuck this"

 

[wizard8873]

"what the fuck? why the hell can't *part* come off?"

"i swear this thing is out to get me. look at how many times it's already cut me!"

"That's it, i've fucking had enough already."

"DAMNIT!!!" as i throw my hands up in confusion and hold myself from throwing a tool at the car or the engine

 

[IDAFC21]

"oh shit, im bleeding!"

 

[Stink Star]

who is the asshole who designed this?

who put this on so tight?

oh shit!

 

[wanablaze]

heres one i used just yesterday

"where the hells the damn fuse box??"

cuz in the gto, to get to the inside fuse box, you have to rip off the entire kick panel underneath the steering wheel. the manual just says its "on the drivers side underneath the instrument cluster" and provides no pictures or anything.

Ha ha. The first time I went looking for it I was like WTF. I was beginning to think that it was actually on the passenger's side (driver's side in Australia) and that GM forgot to update the owner's manual. But yeah, once you've done it once, it's like riding a bike.

Did you end up getting a goat? If it's the one in your sig, Congrats!