Trapped on an 8 Hour Flight With Screaming Toddler

Flyn

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This had to be a bad trip for these passengers. A 3 yr. old with behavioral problems screamed for 8 hours on a flight from Germany to Newark. The mother was unable to control the toddler who freely roamed the plane screaming. (You may want to turn your volume down a bit before clicking)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cg6jvKt2h6s
 

Flyn

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None of the articles mention autism. Obviously the kid has problems the mother knew about yet she did little to prepare for an eight hour flight.

Her carry on could have been full of recorded favorite movies and games. She could have given the kid some kind of doctor prescribed downer. She could have asked the passengers for suggestions. She could have spanked the kid in the old time tested "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about." method.

Instead, it looks like she let the kid scream the whole way. I wonder where he learned how to do that? Bad parents make bad kids.
 

zenriddles

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Imagine the same trip from Germany.

Now, imagine your group of seats was screwed up and the plane overfull so no one was moving anywhere.

Now imagine you didn't even have the TV screen in front of you, you couldn't turn on your reading light, you were in the middle of the cabin seating and mostly in the dark and this little fucker is screaming and kicking your seatback for 8 1/2 hours?

Lufthansa gave me a $150.00 voucher for future travel. On my company's credit card.

BTDT. Sorry for the misfortune.
 

Mike K

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I don't know the specific circumstances here but throwing old mom under the bus might be a bit much. I'm a father of two. My 6 year old boy never required much in the way of extra discipline. We never put on cabinet locks or door knob covers because you could just tell him not to do something and he generally wouldn't. A couple years ago we were in a toy store and he asked me for a lego set. When I told him no he said, "That's ok. I'm sure they'll still be there later". Wait, what? And everyone told me I was such a good dad but no, he was who he was despite me, not because of me.

He was just chill. He still is. Then came my daughter. My 3 year old girl is so incredibly sweet but she is the spawn of Lucifer. She straight up does not listen. You look at her and tell her not to do something and she'll look you straight in the eyes and continue to do it. She doesn't touch her toys but straight up destroys anything that looks like she shouldn't be touching it. She screams, she throws toys, she bites, scratches, pulls out her hair... you name it. Sometimes when she gets mad she slowly scans the area around her, looking for possible projectiles before finding something, picking it up slowly and then throwing it. That's some fucked up shit. You're not even acting out of uncontrollable 3 year old rage at that point. That's calm and calculated. :rofl: Is it because of poor parenting? No. She's 3. She's been this way since I can remember. Is my 6 year old awesome because of parenting? No, probably not. He just has a different disposition. I am really hesitant to blame bad parenting for the actions of a toddler unless the toddler is actively being poorly parented in the moment. As they get older you can start assigning more responsibility to the parents but for a three year old, I guess without knowing all the details I just can't make that statement with the confidence that some here can.

Now if he's 10 and this is still an issue then sure, blame the parents but 3? Nah, I'm hesitant to blame parents for too much just as I'm hesitant to give them too much credit for anything good.
 

greasy

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I don't know the specific circumstances here but throwing old mom under the bus might be a bit much. I'm a father of two. My 6 year old boy never required much in the way of extra discipline. We never put on cabinet locks or door knob covers because you could just tell him not to do something and he generally wouldn't. A couple years ago we were in a toy store and he asked me for a lego set. When I told him no he said, "That's ok. I'm sure they'll still be there later". Wait, what? And everyone told me I was such a good dad but no, he was who he was despite me, not because of me.

He was just chill. He still is. Then came my daughter. My 3 year old girl is so incredibly sweet but she is the spawn of Lucifer. She straight up does not listen. You look at her and tell her not to do something and she'll look you straight in the eyes and continue to do it. She doesn't touch her toys but straight up destroys anything that looks like she shouldn't be touching it. She screams, she throws toys, she bites, scratches, pulls out her hair... you name it. Sometimes when she gets mad she slowly scans the area around her, looking for possible projectiles before finding something, picking it up slowly and then throwing it. That's some fucked up shit. You're not even acting out of uncontrollable 3 year old rage at that point. That's calm and calculated. :rofl: Is it because of poor parenting? No. She's 3. She's been this way since I can remember. Is my 6 year old awesome because of parenting? No, probably not. He just has a different disposition. I am really hesitant to blame bad parenting for the actions of a toddler unless the toddler is actively being poorly parented in the moment. As they get older you can start assigning more responsibility to the parents but for a three year old, I guess without knowing all the details I just can't make that statement with the confidence that some here can.

Now if he's 10 and this is still an issue then sure, blame the parents but 3? Nah, I'm hesitant to blame parents for too much just as I'm hesitant to give them too much credit for anything good.


Behaviors in children starts developing super early. Conditioning of babies can from my experience start just before they turn 1. Are behavioral disorders something we are born with or a conditioned response? I feel it is a conditioned response. The kid in the video has probably gotten his way from a super early age.

In your case is it possible you have eased up in your parenting of your second child or become more involved in your business giving less time to your second child? I’m not criticizing, I only bring it up because you did. I don’t know, but something has to explain your child’s different behavior from your first and I’m guessing that it is not Lucifer.
 

Mike K

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Behaviors in children starts developing super early. Conditioning of babies can from my experience start just before they turn 1. Are behavioral disorders something we are born with or a conditioned response? I feel it is a conditioned response. The kid in the video has probably gotten his way from a super early age.

In your case is it possible you have eased up in your parenting of your second child or become more involved in your business giving less time to your second child? I’m not criticizing, I only bring it up because you did. I don’t know, but something has to explain your child’s different behavior from your first and I’m guessing that it is not Lucifer.

No, it's not possible. Do you have children?
 

Mike K

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I forgot to add, you are doing things right if your kid is being respectful in the store about the Legos.

I don't know that I am because my daughter wouldn't act that way and she's parented the same way. That's just not her. It wasn't me as a child either. I would nag the snot out of my parents for stuff until they were just utterly exhausted (and they still wouldn't cave). My little brother was more like my son.

All the people I talk to talk about how different their children are. It's something my mom has always said. I was the easy one. My older brother was a nightmare. He was an incredible handful for them at a young age and round about his mid-20's he just grew up. You'd have thought he was a product of poor parenting up until then though.

You know another thing to consider, we all went to a private school and my parents shelled out decent money for that yet not a single one of us graduated on graduation day. I was given a blank diploma and had to take another course in the summer to get my real diploma. The same goes for my older brother and the same for my younger. I joke around with my younger brother that I was 46 out of 46 in class ranking and he laughed because he was 44 out of 44.

Now my younger brother is successful, I like to think I am too and my older brother codes trading algorithms for hedge funds, all self-taught. No schooling. And it was all just our path. I told my mom - and both my brothers agree - there was nothing she could have done in high school to make me pass. Absolutely nothing. She took away my tv, she made teachers sign a slip stating whether or not I had homework, she called teachers at the school to find out when I had tests... There was just nothing she could have done. I didn't care. And yet people would likely unfairly judge her.

I realize I'm going off on a bit of a side store there but getting back to my kids, I noticed from a very young age how they acted. My son was always chill, even as a baby. My daughter wasn't. They are parented exactly the same now and my son is still calmer than her. It just is what it is. They respond to things differently because they are different human beings with different personalities. At age 10 if they're polite and well behaved or complete jerks then I'll own the good or the bad. But at 3? No, not so much. I think it can be the doing of the parents but it's certainly not a foregone conclusion that it is.
 
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